How shall I descibe it?
Is there enough letters in a word to tell You how I feel?
No, they couldn't contain the magnitude of how I feel.

Like the waves that buffet the rocks of the shore,
I've been buffeted for more than a hundred times,

Each crash of the wave shapes the rock,
It shapes the character to the core.
It endured hundreds of crashes from the waves,
but it will endure, persevere and stand strong for another thousand more.

Lord, hold me close to You,
As I hold on close to You,
And as I hold on to what I have and been through ever so closely,
I will choose to hold on to what you have ahead of me even more dearly.

You are my Rock whom I cling to.
You are my Banner whom I find strength.
You are my Refuge whom I find safety.
You are Jesus.

My desires, my heart, and my whole self,
You know them all.
You hold them all in the palm of Your hands.
In You I find me.

Without You, I'm nothing,
But with You, my dear Lord, I'm all I can be.

Make my life as a love song for You.

Holy One
Breath of life breathe into me
Come and saturate my soul

I stand in awe
Take me deeper into You
Come and wash me in Your Love

You draw me closer to You
You draw me closer to You, oh to You

Holy, I will sing forever
Give You my heart
You alone are God of all the earth
And I live for You

Mighty, King of heaven
Glory and Honour to You
Shine Your light for all the world to see
Cause You live in me

Jesus, Jesus, Jesus
You are my God
You are my God

One former colleague of mine made this statement when I was working in a marketing company in the city last December.

Why is it that when people grow up, they lose the ability to dream anymore.

A boy would dream of becoming an astronaut one day, but as he grows up, ask him what's his dream. Isn't it ironic that people lose the ability to dream as they grow up. Most settle for a decent job (nothing wrong with it), and do life for the next 40+ years.

I'm talking about myself. Being in a church that talks about dreams, making champions out of ourselves and having a vision and hope for our lives, sure made me think and stirred me up in this area.

Hence, I ask the question to myself, "What are your dreams, R a y m o n d Chuah?"

...


My dream.

Here goes:

1. Being an influential figure in the advertising and media industry, where I am able to make Christ known through the media and using what the devil has used for the past decades for God's glory.

2. Be a drummer for an international, world-travelling band (strictly Christian band).

3. Be both a drummer and a pastor of the fastest growing church in Asia (hah! drummer bit sounds goooood!)

4. Live in a house with a loving wife, kids, 5 bedrooms, 2 study, a large entertainment room, 3-car garage, and acres of land, I wouldn't object to a beachfront property somewhere in Sydney or Gold Coast. ( haha! :P)

5. Drive a fast car, fast! :D wheeeeeeeeeeee!

...

I reckon that's my top 5 list of dream stuff I want to see happening. But you know what? After writing this.... my heart's desire is to this: To hear God tell me that I've been a good and faithful servant. To know God like how greats like Abraham and David knew God. To be called a friend of God and to be a man that chases after the heart of God.

Yeah... it sounds right.

Cynicism is the bane of this generation.

There I was sitting amongst my group of colleagues and his friends. He was having his 22nd birthday at Sante in Crown. I was really minding my own business while being constantly distracted by the amount of food on my plate (thank heavens!) There was an occasional chat with the person on my left and with my colleague on my right. Not a long time after I digged in, a conversation between my colleague and his friends around him at the end of the table caught my attention.

Now, he was debating on something that is very common in this generation and something that the Church considers a disease of this generation. This statement sums up the whole idea of the conversation for the night - 'How is it possible for a guy to stay loyal to his wife for life, surely he will commit some kind of adultery down the road.'

The idea of a man staying loyal, committed and intimate with his wife for the rest of his life doesn't seem to make sense in his mind. He had a puzzled look on his face when another girl on the table mentioned that it is possible. How the society has twisted the whole institution of marriage and the word commitment, it's beyond me. But one thing I know is this; the question that is at hand is not how or why a man (or woman for that matter) can stay faithful to their spouse, rather the question is WHY NOT.

Why not? Can someone point out to me at where have we gone so wrong is the past years or decades, that the society has come down to this low. Where have we gone wrong that the morals of this generation is down the dumps. I know I'm talking about something that has probably existed for the past 20 over years, but since when did we let such cynicism creep into our society and families?

For those who know God, I mean... know God for who He is, for who He truly is, I say with all conviction that there is no reason why a man or woman cannot stay committed and intimate to their spouse for the rest of their life. Marriage is an institution that comes from God and it has always been meant to reflect God's love and His character. For people that has doubts that being Christian is not being romantic and boring, obviously they haven't read Bible. Turn to Song of Songs (man! talk about being graphic! hah)

There is a famine, a disease in our land.. the cure only comes from God through His church. People need God. Everytime without fail, God's simple truth breaks the cynicism of man and their walls of distrust and insecurity. We all need God.

"Not by might nor by power, but My Spirit, says the Lord Almighty." Zechariah 4:6

"I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." Galations 2:20

Based on those verses, God is saying He will empower us to do it. It is possible, with Him, all things are!

Cynicism may be the bane, but Christ is the answer.

Life is like a box of chocolates, tied to a bungee rope.

Hold on tight.

The bungee rope of God's faithfulness and love. Unbreakable, lifts us up higher than where we were before. Hold on tight, cling on to it, never let it go.

Your Glory - Planetshakers

Break of day
Your light it shines on us
And Your glory fills this place

Like the sun
It rises up on us
It's the glory of Your face

And I lift my eyes to heaven
And I lift my eyes to heaven

Your glory
The whole earth is filled with Your glory
The nations cry out they sing
Holy, holy, is the Lord
Your glory
Jesus, one touch of Your glory
I lift up my hands and sing
Holy, Holy is the Lord

Show me Your glory (repeat)

2 days ago, I was in this small but quaint music store, called 'Dragonfly Records' at Elizabeth St. They stock some pretty good collection of CDs and vinyls at real good prices. I spent about an hour there when I came back from work, call it loitering but it was therapeutic. I remember the tips of my fingers having a thin layer of dust from flipping through the CDs :) heh...

Alright this is the story, I was waiting for my turn to pay for the CDs I decided to get, when I heard a man falling to the ground. I turned around and saw this aussie in his twenties, having some epileptic fits. He was shaking real bad and saw his eyeballs roll up. I felt like I need to do something, but my lack of knowledge to attend to such situation made me froze in my standing position.

The store assistant, a grungy looking man was panicking and was pacing back and forth thinking of what to do, when the friend of this guy who had fits told him to call the ambulance. Made me wonder 'You mean, you didn't think about that?' So he did call the ambulance and after about 5 minutes, the paramedics came and carry him out of the store.

Just thought it's something you don't get to see in a music store everyday? Oh, anyway... I did pray for him and before I left the store, heh :p

Poor guy. But on another random note, I do remember the time when I was in that stretcher in a similiar ambulance.

Pain, much pain...

heh :)

Raymond "The Bummer'" Chuah (Jan '05 - March '05):

Sleep - 10 hrs (on average)
On his lappie - 4 hrs
Bum* - Rest of the day
Devotion - 15min
TOTAL - 24 HRS

* Bumming consists of sitting around watching TV, eating random meals, and er... more sitting around? :p

Raymond "The Intern & Graphic Designer" Chuah (post March '05):

Sleep - 6hrs
Work - 8 hrs
Travel to work - 2 hrs
Meals - approx. 2 hrs
Devotion - 1 hr
On the phone - 1.5 hrs
Misc* - 2.5 hrs
TOTAL - 24 HRS

* Misc consists of going to urbanlife, inner champions discipleship, urbanlife leaders' discipleship, writing bible studies, calling up new christians and new people and (sigh)... any other stuff that comes by.


It's all good, Lord. I believe it's all good.

Sunday 15 May 2005

Seasons did come and go.
There are certain milestones in life that are personal. This is one of them for me.
I know that there will be more of these milestones in the future, and only God knows which day and date they are. I'm glad that they are all in His hands, for there is always safety and security in that.

The same hands that made me in my mother's womb, the same hands that snatched me from the grip of darkness and planted me in the kingdom of light, are also the same hands that will take my hand and walk me into the future He has for me.

It's all in His control, 15 May 2005 and beyond.

nos·tal·gi·a n.

1. A bittersweet longing for things, persons, or situations of the past.

How apt. Since when did anyone teach the dictionary to read a person's mind.
Then again, since when did God pass the Ray of 12 May 2005 by?

Psalms 139

v.3 You chart the path ahead of me and tell me when to stop and rest. Every moment you know where I am

v.5 You both precede and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head.

v.6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too great for me to know.

thank You, Lord.

thank You.

There's something about the window seat: Some people love it, some people hate it. Some people would book way in advance for it, others are satisfied with aisle seat. While some others, had to endure what is known as 'The Sardine Can'.

There's something about sitting in the window seat. I remember when I had my first plane ride to Penang when I was a young boy. It was only an hour long air travel aboard the Malaysian Airlines System. I remember slowly sliding the plastic window shade up, peeking through the airplane window, the first thing I noticed was the huge span of wings the plane had. I thought to myself, they sure look big and heavy, but even then, I have to rely on them to bring me up to the clouds, nonetheless.

As soon as the aircraft took off, I noticed how the mechanical wing modified itself slightly so that we will be able to fly full speed at minimal friction. It was in that window seat, I saw (what looked like to me then) the world. I saw mountains reduced to a tiny speck, I saw the city of KL I live in reduced to a mere dot. In a matter of minutes, they all disappeared and all I see is the blue sky and white clouds. All while I'm glued to my window seat.

I want to be in the window seat. I am not refering to an airplane window seat. I want to be booked in to the window seat of the Kingdom Airlines System. I want to ride on the wings of God. When I look out of the window, all I see is the huge span of God's wings. I want to hear Him say 'Trust Me, I'll bring you to your destination safely.' In an instance, I want to soar on the wings of God. To slide that window shade up and see my earthly cares fade away in His glorious light. Oh... the joy of soaring on eagles' wings with God.

Book me in to that window seat, Lord.

I trust You. Through the storms and turbulance that may come, I trust You.

This... is the writings of a window seat traveller.

6:06pm in Melbourne Australia.
Some kind of electro/breakbeat music playing in the background.
It's 15 degrees now.

Woke up from an unscheduled nap. It's funny how those phone calls start coming when you are about to go to sleep. By the time I woke up, it was already fully dark. Yet when I look at the time, it's only 5.35pm. Only managed to squeeze in 30 minutes of sleep.

6:12pm now.
Some kind of Eva Cassidy playing.
Cold, cold Melbourne.